Author Archives: Kneeknee

Vegan Christmas Tofu Turkey

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Vegan Christmas Tofu Turkey

Ingredients

Serves: 10
  • 2kg extra firm tofu, crumbled
  • 2 tablespoons sesame oil
  • 1 red onion, finely diced
  • 4 celery sticks, chopped
  • 220g mushrooms, chopped
  • 2 cloves garlic, finely chopped
  • 1 teaspoon chopped fresh sage
  • 1 tablespoon chopped fresh thyme
  • 1 tablespoon chopped fresh rosemary
  • salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste
  • 5 cups dried breadcrumbs
  • extra 6 tablespoons sesame oil
  • 6 tablespoons soy sauce
  • 2 tablespoons miso paste
  • 5 tablespoons orange juice
  • 1/2 teaspoon orange rind
  • 1 teaspoon mustard
  • 3 sprigs fresh rosemary to serve

Preparation method

Prep: 3 hours | Cook: 2 hours

Line a round medium sized colander with muslin or a clean tea towel.
Place the crumbled tofu in the colander.
Place another towel or sheet of muslin over the tofu and place a heavy weight on top. Place the colander over a bowl to catch the liquid.
Refrigerate for 2 to 3 hours.
Make the stuffing: In a large frying pan, gently fry the onion, celery and mushrooms in the 2 tablespoons of sesame oil until tender.
Add the garlic, sage, thyme, rosemary, salt and pepper.
Stir well and cook for 5 minutes, then add breadcrumbs and mix well.
Remove from heat.
Preheat the oven to 200 C. Grease a baking tray.
In a small bowl combine the extra sesame oil, soy sauce, miso paste, orange juice, orange rind and mustard and mix well.
Remove the weight from the tofu and discard the liquid.
Hollow out the tofu so there is 2.5cm of tofu still lining the colander.
Place the scooped out tofu in a separate bowl.
Spoon the stuffing into the centre of the tofu case.
Place the leftover tofu on top of the stuffing and press down firmly.
Turn the stuffed tofu out on to the baking tray and gently press the sides to form a more oval shape.
Brush the tofu with half the sesame oil sauce, place the rosemary sprigs on top and cover with foil.
Bake for one hour, then remove the tofu from the oven and discard the foil.
Brush the tofu with the remaining sesame oil sauce (reserving 4 tablespoons), then return to the oven and bake another hour, or until the tofu-turkey is golden brown.
Place on a serving platter, brush with the remaining oil mixture and serve hot.

Barbecued Chicken with Fresh Mango Salsa

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Barbecued Chicken with Fresh Mango Salsa

Barbecued Chicken with Fresh Mango Salsa

Ingredients

Serves: 4
  • 4 (100g) skinless, boneless chicken breast fillets
  • salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste
  • 1 tablespoon olive oil
  • 2 cloves garlic, peeled and minced
  • 1 (2cm) piece fresh ginger root, minced
  • 2 mangoes, peeled and diced
  • 2 tablespoons cider vinegar
  • 1 teaspoon white wine
  • 4 tablespoons chopped fresh coriander

Preparation method
Prep: 10 minutes | Cook: 25 minutes

Preheat barbecue on high heat, and lightly oil cooking grate.
Rub chicken breast fillets with salt and pepper.
Cook on hot barbecue for 10 to 15 minutes on each side, until no longer pink and juices run clear.
Remove from heat, set aside, and keep warm.
Heat oil in a frying pan over medium heat, and sauté garlic for about 1 minute.
Add ginger and mangoes and cook 3 to 4 minutes until mangoes are tender.
Add the cider vinegar and white wine.
Season with salt and pepper.
Stir in coriander, and remove from heat.
Spoon frying pan mixture over the barbecued chicken to serve.

Christmas Cherry and Fruit Cake

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Christmas Cherry and Fruit Cake

Christmas Cherry and Fruit Cake

Ingredients

Serves: 8
  • 250g butter
  • 200g white sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • 1/2 cup (125ml) orange juice
  • 2 cups (250g) plain flour
  • 1 teaspoon baking powder
  • 375g sultanas
  • 250g halved glace cherries
  • Preparation method
    Prep: 30 minutes | Cook: 2 hours
  • Preheat oven to 150 degrees C. Grease and line a 22x13cm loaf tin with baking paper.
    Cream butter and sugar together until light and fluffy. Add beaten eggs and orange juice and mix well.
    Sift flour and baking powder. Reserve 1/3 cup of flour mixture and toss with sultanas and cherries (this will keep them from sinking to the bottom of the cake).
    Add flour mixture to batter and blend. Add floured raisins and cherries to dough and mix until just combined.
    Pour batter into prepared loaf tin. Bake in pre-heated oven for 2 1/2 hours.
    Wrap the cake in cling wrap or foil and store in a sealed tin for a couple of days before serving.

Christmas cooking: Lime-glazed ham

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Christmas cooking Lime-glazed ham

Christmas cooking: Lime-glazed ham

Ingredients
1 leg of ham {around 7kg – mine weighed a whopping 10kg}
1 cup of brown sugar
2 tsp ground ginger
2 tbs Dijon mustard
1 lime, finely zest
1/4 cup lime juice
2 tbs rum
1/2 cup white sugar
1/2 cup water
3 limes, extra
Whole cloves {about 10}
Method
♥ Preheat the oven to 180 degrees celcius. Line a large roasting pan with foil or just buy one of those disposable BBQ trays {I did that}. Weigh your ham {you might have to use the bathroom scales like we did!} and calculate 20 minutes per kilogram.
♥ Remove the skin from the ham. You can do this by running your thumb between the skin and the fat layer. Cut the skin around the shank {the bone at the end so the skin will detach}. You can keep the skin to place back on top of your ham to keep it moist.
♥ Score the fat in a diagonal pattern. Don’t cut too deep. Use a really sharp knife to make it easier. Place in the roasting tray.
♥ In a bowl, mix the brown sugar, the ginger, the Dijon mustard and the lime zest and juice. Mix it together until a paste forms. Use half of the paste over to brush over the ham.
♥ Place in the oven and cook for 20 minutes. Reduce the temperature to 160 degrees celcius, use the other half of the paste and brush over the ham. Continue cooking the ham {using the time you calculated when weighing it} and baste the ham every 30 minutes. It sound laborious, but put on a movie, set a timer and it only takes a few minutes to baste {so worth it for the end flavour. I promise!}.
♥ While the ham is cooking, make the final glaze. Place the white sugar and water in pot over medium heat. Simmer until the sugar dissolves, stirring until it does. Slice up 1 of the limes and add to the sugar/water mix. Simmer gently for 5 minutes. Turn off heat and allow to cool.
♥ Once the ham is cooked and out of the oven, brush over with the lime glaze. For a little extra wow factor, slice the 2 remaining limes and place on the cooked ham, securing with the cloves or a toothpick {if the cloves won’t stay}.
♥ Serve the ham warm or cold.

Recipe Source:  Fat Mum Slim

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Karen Martini’s Christmas feast

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Karen Martini's Christmas feast

Karen Martini’s Christmas feast

Ingredients:

Ham

organic free-range ham, bone in (about 7kg)
peel of 2 oranges (peel with a knife, don’t grate or zest)
15 cloves, plus extra cloves for garnish
8 whole allspice berries
5 fresh bay leaves
2 heads of garlic, cut in half crossways
375g of quality cumquat marmalade (orange or mandarin would also work well)
100ml verjuice

Pineapple
2 pineapples, reserve the heads for garnish
2 tsp of allspice, ground
2 tsp of ground black pepper
1 tbs olive oil

Method
Note: You’ll need a massive pot – about 20 litres – for this, but it’s fine to leave the shank sticking out a little. Alternatively, you can use a smaller or boneless ham but just need to reduce the poaching time, to about 45 minutes.

1. Take the ham out of the fridge at least half an hour before cooking.
2. Place the ham in a large stock pot and cover with cold water, add the orange peel, cloves, allspice, bay leaves and garlic and bring to a simmer. Simmer slowly for one hour.
3. While the ham simmers, peel the pineapples then slice in half lengthways and cut into long wedges, about 3 to 4 wedges per half.
4. Toss the pineapple wedges through the allspice, pepper and oil and place in a baking tray big enough to hold the ham.
5. In a saucepan gently heat the marmalade and verjuice. Stir to combine.
6. Preheat oven to 180C fan-forced or 200C conventional.
7. Lift the ham out of the liquid carefully, perhaps gripping it with tea towels, and place in the baking tray with the pineapple. Pull off the skin, leaving the fat intact. Lightly score the fat with a knife in a traditional diamond pattern, or just in lines, and stud with the extra cloves. Glaze the ham and pineapple with half of the marmalade.
8. Place the baking tray in the preheated oven and bake for about 25 minutes, glaze again with the remaining marmalade and bake until a dark golden colour, about 10 more minutes. You will need to keep a careful eye on the ham as ovens may perform differently with such a large joint. Halfway through the cooking process put the pineapple heads in the oven with the ham.
9. Present the ham whole, surrounded by the pineapple with the heads for garnish. Carve at the table and serve with the roasted pineapple and any juices in the tray.

Tip: You can also bake the ham in a medium-hot (no hotter than 230C) barbecue with the lid closed.

Boxing Day sandwiches with ham, gruyere cheese, mustard and pickles is a big tradition in my house. Please buy a free-range ham and organic if you can, it is well worth the extra cost.

 Recipe Source:  Good Food

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Safest girl in the world

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Safest girl in the world

No one would be game to upset her!
Pit bull myths
It’s the owner not the breed
The outdated debate, “It’s the owner, not the breed,” has caused the pit bull problem to grow into a 30-year old problem.1 Designed to protect pit bull breeders and owners, the slogan ignores the genetic history of the breed and blames these horrific maulings — inflicted by the pit bulls genetic “hold and shake” bite style — on environmental factors. While environment plays a role in a pit bull’s behaviour, it is genetics that leaves pit bull victims with permanent and disfiguring injuries.

The pit bulls genetic traits are not in dispute. Many appellate courts agree that pit bulls pose a significant danger to society and can be regulated accordingly. Some of the genetic traits courts have identified include: unpredictability of aggression, tenacity (“gameness” the refusal to give up a fight), high pain tolerance and the pit bulls “hold and shake” bite style.  According to forensic medical studies, similar injuries have only been found elsewhere on victims of shark attacks. Read more:   http://www.dogsbite.org/dangerous-dogs-pit-bull-myths.php

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One for the ladies and some of the men

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One for the ladies and some of the men

One for the ladies and some of the men

Men are always whining about how we are suffocating them.

Personally I think if you can hear them whining you’re not pressing

hard enough on the pillow!

Picture Source:  http://nonsensicalbabble.files.wordpress.com/2012/05/98-year-old-woman.jpg

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Red or White

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Red or White

Red or White

 

Thank you Sue. Someone has to make the tough decisions.

**********

Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it’s our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you’d want to have dinner with.

**********

The policeman signals to an car driver to pull over to the side of the road, due to the fact that he appears to be driving erratically. He says to the driver, “You appear to have been drinking!”

The driver answers, “No sir, I am just tired.”

The policeman looks into the car and notices that the driver is a priest! He also notices that there is an empty bottle on the floor. He says to the driver, “What is, or should I say was in this bottle?

The driver answers, “Water!”

The policeman says, “It is not, it’s wine!”

The driver looks up to the heavens and says, “Oh Lord, you have done it again!”

**********

California vintners in the Napa Valley area, which primarily produces Pinot Blanc, Pinot Noir and Pinot Grigio wines, have developed a new hybrid grape that acts as an anti-diuretic.

It is expected to reduce the number of trips older people have to make to the bathroom during the night.

The new wine will be marketed as Pino More.

**********

A woman was sipping on a glass of wine, while sitting on the patio with her husband, and she says, “I love you so much, I don’t know how I could ever live without you.”

Her husband asks, “Is that you or the wine talking?”

She replies, “It’s me………talking to the wine.”

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One for the dog lovers

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One for the dog lovers

This is so true

 It’s the owner not the breed

The outdated debate, “It’s the owner, not the breed,” has caused the pit bull problem to grow into a 30-year old problem.1 Designed to protect pit bull breeders and owners, the slogan ignores the genetic history of the breed and blames these horrific maulings — inflicted by the pit bulls genetic “hold and shake” bite style — on environmental factors. While environment plays a role in a pit bull’s behaviour, it is genetics that leaves pit bull victims with permanent and disfiguring injuries.

The pit bulls genetic traits are not in dispute. Many appellate courts agree that pit bulls pose a significant danger to society and can be regulated accordingly. Some of the genetic traits courts have identified include: unpredictability of aggression, tenacity (“gameness” the refusal to give up a fight), high pain tolerance and the pit bulls “hold and shake” bite style.  According to forensic medical studies, similar injuries have only been found elsewhere on victims of shark attacks.

Source:   http://www.dogsbite.org/dangerous-dogs-pit-bull-myths.php