These 10 tips are brief enough to consider in a moment. And big enough to make a difference.

1. Do less. Whenever people get together, it’s atmosphere that matters most, not that impressive menu.

2. Drink less. Alcohol can lift people’s spirits – but only in small amounts. Too much – and old resentments will come pouring out.

3. Check your expectations. Not just of other people. Also of yourself. Are they the slightest bit unreasonable? Sometimes we set ourselves up for disappointment by expecting the impossible. Be realistic. Yet always ready to be enchanted.

4. Focus on what’s going well right now. Or what’s most uplifting. Forget the rest.

5. Speak up. Let people know how much you appreciate them, even when their choice of gifts, or their habits or views, leaves much to be desired. “I really love the way you…” opens hearts and mends all kinds of bridges.

6. Give thanks. Be lavish in your gratitude that there are people in your life to care about. They are imperfect, of course. Isn’t everyone? Give thanks, too, that you and yours have somewhere safe to sleep at night and food and funds to share.

7. Re-value silence. This is not the time to be honest if that means being critical, undermining or telling anyone what they “need to hear”. Biting back any words that are less than encouraging is a lasting act of love.

8. Re-value forgiveness. Yourself, others, God, or life itself? Learning something from what went wrong, giving new value to the present moment, it becomes possible to move forward.

9. Re-value good humour. Become someone who’s easy to be around. And even easier to like. It’s the best gift you will ever give. And it’s certainly the best gift your dear ones will ever receive.

10. Give pleasure, great memories, generosity of spirit, laughter, music, silly hats and games, and little acts of constant kindness. ‘Tis the season of joy, indeed. And of peace.

By Stephanie Dowrick

As a child, my party piece was a recitation of The Ant and The Grasshopper by La Fontaine, a French fable eulogising the hardworking and forward-thinking ant, to the detriment of the merry grasshopper who sang all summer instead of hoarding food for the winter. This summer, I may not have been singing, but I wasn’t squirrelling aside my usual baskets of seed heads, berries and fruits for my Christmas decoration bonanza. The weather hasn’t helped. The wind and the rain have put pay to many of my usual sources, so it has been slim pickings.

Luckily, florists Jen Stuart-Smith and Bek Bibby of Blooming Green are wise and provident, and grow flowers, berries and seed heads to pick all the year through on their plot at Loddington Farm in Kent.This year they ran a course on Christmas decoration making, teaching students how to make a fabulous table lantern, decorated with twigs and berries, that readers could adapt to make at home (see instructions, below). The provident will book in for one of their courses in time for next year.

Local florist Anna Evans (annascountryflowers.co.uk) also grows her floral ingredients on the family fruit farm in Chilham, Kent. She suggests a pretty pair of hydrangea lollipop trees in painted pots to set on either side of the mantlepiece. Starting with two dry oasis balls (available from floristsuppliesuk.com), small bunches of dried hydrangea florets are poked into the ball until it is covered. Attach the ball to a hazel stick or ribbon-covered length of bamboo, and anchor into a flowerpot (filled with gravel) that has been spray-painted or covered in découpage. Alternatively, wet oasis balls could be festooned with bunches of bay leaves, or sweet-smelling herbs for festive topiaries.

How to make a Christmas lantern

For this project you will need:

• Copper florists’ mesh (from rainbowfloristsupplies.co.uk) or any mesh – even sprayed chicken wire would do.

• A large tin or straight-sided container to use as a former.

• A coordinated coloured candle – keep it in a jam jar to be on the safe side.

• A bunch of hazel, red, yellow or lime green dogwood, willow, birch or any garden twigs you can find.

• A selection of berries: cotoneaster, rose hips, Chinese lanterns, spindle berries, sprayed ivy berry clusters, crab apples, catkins, honesty coins, or cranberries threaded on wire.

To make your lantern:

1 Roll the florists’ mesh around your former to create a well. Use florists’ snips to cut the wire.

2 Thread the twigs through the mesh to make an attractive shape.

3 Thread berries or seed heads onto lengths of wire to attach them to the twigs, then incorporate into the design. Set the arrangement safely on a table. Don’t leave candles unattended.

For more inspiration:

• Elspeth Thompson and Ros Badger’s book, Homemade, has been abridged for celebratory projects: Christmas and Festive Decorations, full of lovely home-craft projects.

• essentialscompany.co.uk sells an array of dried pods and seed heads, cedar roses and cones (pine, alder, larch maritima and plumosum), also dried citrus fruit, tiny pumpkins and artificial berries. W & M Smith in Suffolk stocks everything a crafty florist could need (see wandmsmith.co.uk).

Not all my garden foraging projects were a complete disaster, I’ve been a busy bee and managed a few decorations:

• A garland of tiny dried artichoke heads, past their prime, sprayed gold and threaded evenly (spaced every 6in) on garden twine, to hang above my French windows.

• A bunch of dried allium (Cristophii and Schubertii) heads sprayed in pastel colours, ends tipped with crystals from a car boot necklace.

• A wreath of dried eucalyptus leaves in pale blue/green that have been pressed flat between sheets of newspaper then glue gunned onto a wire frame; and another of heart-shaped purple Cercis canadensis mixed with butter yellow moth-shaped Ginkgo biloba leaves.

• This year, my tree will be a piece of fig bough sprayed flat white, decorated with little birds (floristsuppliesuk.com), dried kumquats and rosehips.

• Blooming Green sells hand-picked, seasonal, eco-friendly organically grown flowers. For courses, events, wedding flowers and online bouquets, see bloominggreenflowers.co.uk

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/gardening/9735713/Make-your-own-Christmas-lantern.html